Christopher Oji is presently the President of the Crime Reporters’ Association of Nigeria. Since Oji became the president, he has bitterly learned the true meaning of ‘uneasy lies the head that wears the crown.’
Many of his members present a myriad of complaints before him, expecting him to wave an invisible magic wand and wrought a miracle and make their problems and troubles go away.
Some days ago, he complained to me about the latest in the myriad of complainants besieging his phones and office. This latest complainant was a woman. Wife to one of the members of the association Oji presides over.
The woman complained bitterly to Oji that her husband, for reasons she could not fathom, had simply stopped making love with her. Now get this right: It’s not that the guy can no longer get his manhood up. Nay. It’s simply that he could not get it up where his legal wife is concerned.
Oji has heard of several stupidities while playing his role as president, but that apparently took the prize. There was a time a crime reporter, who couldn’t control his candy stick, balled the secretary of the association and got her filled to the brim. The irate aunt of the secretary went for Oji’s jugular.
The way she went after Oji, calling his phone lines and storming his office at the Press Centre, you would think Oji did the pleasurable job of balling the girl and getting her pregnant. The irate aunt wanted poor Oji to convince the reporter to make an honest woman out of her niece.
Anyway, enough of the digression!
Apparently trying to make the woman who came to report her journalist husband avoiding sex with her feel understood, Oji told her to come with her husband to see him. The couple came and the husband presented a genuine reason he could not ball his wife.
He cried plaintively: “I just don’t know what to do. Anytime I’m with my wife, I won’t feel like making love, no matter how hard I tried to make myself want to. But once I’m with my mistress, I can do it many times!”
Oji and the guy’s wife were nonplussed. The woman apparently didn’t know that what she was not getting, somebody was getting it good! Oji called the guy names and told him in clear terms to go and work on his manhood and make sure it works for his legal wife.
Now, we’ve reached the point of my contention with Oji. I told Oji that there could be many reasons for a guy losing sexual interest in his wife. The guy can’t just order his manhood to perform, and it will.
Sexual performances or sexual needs entail a lot of things. The guy needs to respond to what he sees or imagines or lusts after.
The eyes feed and send messages to the brain, which sends messages to the lower part of the guy, thus engorging his manhood with the latent need to penetrate, browse and download into a babe’s website.
There are many reasons a guy can stop feeling the urge to make love with his wife. Many guys have told me that they can’t stand eating egusi soup every day, thus they must go out to eat ogbono soup elsewhere.
But any sensible guy who plays the field knows that if you eat ogbono soup outside, you must come home to eat egusi soup because egusi is the legal wife. If a guy repeatedly denies his wife sex, what does he want her to do? Where the heck does he want her to go?
A randy husband should know how to balance his relationships, so as not to hurt any of the women in his life.
Stress is also an indicator, which can factor in making a guy not have sex with his wife always or as often as he used to. If a guy used to make love to his wife seven times a week and he slows down thrice, some women see it as ‘he no longer wants me….’
The guy could be tired or stressed out. So give him a break dearie!
Frankly, several experts have argued that sex is a good medicine/remedy for stress. Men should stop using tiredness and stress as a reason to avoid balling their wives.
If a guy returns from the office and due to working hours and of course, traffic jams, he’s tired, all he needs to do is to have a shower and rest. Once he balls his wife after resting, he would sleep like a newborn babe.
The guy, however, should know his body constitution. He could also decide to shower, eat, sleep, and wake up later to ball his wife. He should know the way he wants to go about it, but to repeatedly fall into bed and leave your wife’s yearning and a smoking body, is simply begging for trouble.
It however doesn’t make sense for him to collapse on his wife’s body while trying to please her.
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