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| Photo:Naija Standard Newspaper |
Where are your children right now?
The question is a catchy one that a popular Nigerian news presenter often used in the 80s to ginger parents and guardians into pondering about their kids.
Today, that question is still relevant to every one of us as parents, if not more so. Poor parenting can lead youths to violent crimes.
The everyday security challenges in our country, couple with growing crime waves among youths and shocking growth of technology (internet), make the question fitting.
It also highlights the astonishing story of Solomon.
I had been covering the crime beat for years, when I encountered Solomon, fondly called Solo.
He was the first 10-year-old boy that I had ever met arrested for armed robbery. It was a shocking and incredible encounter for me.
After Solo, no doubt more children, younger and older than him, had been arrested for various crimes.
The in flock of children into crimes ought to be a major concern to any parent and in fact, governments at every level.
Anyway, Solo was living in Ajegunle area of Boundary, Lagos, with his parents. He was a fun loving boy; full of life and often smiling.
A few minutes after speaking with him, it dawned on me that he was a respectful kid.
It was this respectful attitude that got almost everyone in his community sending him on errands.
One of those that used to send him on errands initiated him into armed robbery.
Solo calls him, ‘brother,’ as a mark of respect for an elder in the same community.
When he invited Solo to become his conductor, Solo couldn’t say no.
So, his life of crime started. The ‘brother’ was actually a member of a ‘One Chance’ gang. The gang used commercial bus, to pick unsuspecting passengers hurrying home after office hours. They would later rob the passengers and push them out of the moving bus.
The gang deliberately selected Solo for his role as conductor.
No passenger would ever suspect a 10-year-old boy of being a member of an armed robbery gang.
Solo got used to seeing AK47 rifles and other guns. He got used to seeing passengers being roughened before their valuables were taken.
He got used to seeing passengers beaten because they didn’t have enough money on them or attempted to be stubborn. He became a passive smoker, inhaling smokes from Indian hemp.
Solo and his gang members were arrested by policemen attached to the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS), Ikeja, Lagos State Police Command.
He was a likable kid. The policemen liked and treated him well. They gave him good food and clothing. Yes, I know; I monitored him.
The shocking fact for me was that his parents almost fainted when they heard that Solo was part of a robbery gang. They couldn’t believe their ears. They so much trusted his ‘elder brother.’
The trust was so strong that they didn’t bother to ask where this ‘brother’ used to go with their son, whenever he took the kid out.
It’s this sort of stupid, foolish trust that is giving rise to increase in sexual molestation and violation of children right under the noses of their parents and guardians.
So, back to our question; where are your children right now?
Can you honestly beat your chest and say you know where and what your kid is doing right now?
As parents, we need to begin to build and train our kids. We need to begin to instil better values in them.
Solo’s parents failed him. We shouldn’t fail ours.
Our children are not just future of Nigeria, but going by Africa’s cosmology, they are actually the future of our tomorrowas parents.
If we don’t look out for our kids, someone else would. And you can bet, the person wouldn’t give your kid his best.
Solo’s parents allowed a neighbour to take over the upbringing of their son.
The ‘elder brother’ was grooming him to become the next robbery gang leader. Solo looked up to him and trusted him, and he exploited that trust.
To Solo, this ‘elder brother’ couldn’t do anything wrong. Solo was brainwashed and would have been used as machinery to brainwash and lure other kids into crime.
If not for the smashing of the gang, perhaps the circle of picking kids and grooming them into robbery, by the gang would have continued.
We would have had a society of youths wielding guns, running around, killing, maiming and robbing citizens.
You may argue that we do still have kids in crime, but every effort on the part of everyone counts. And every successful effort means something in our community.
If not for police efforts and success, Solo would grow up with a skewered value system, seeing robbery as the right course. The gang members had already glamorised crime to him.
If Solo had grown up in that world, there is a likely chance he would become rich; although riches are not often guaranteed in crime.
For the sake of argument, if Solo had become rich, participating in different crimes, he would very likely tell other kids that he got to where he was without an education.
What do you think such a testimony would have done to psychic of some kids? Even an educated criminal is dangerous to family, friends and society.
At the end, everyone gets hurt. It’s like hurling a stone into a glass house.
A family is the beginning and shaping of a society. We need to get it right from the family front.
We can’t continue to ignore the youth in our society, for they make up a large percentage of that society.
They are inheritors of our tomorrow. It’s our responsibilities as parents, to safe and preserves that society for them, by inculcating enviable moral values into them.
Change for a better society begins with you as a parent; not your kids’ teachers or clerics.
Where are your children right now? What are they doing? What kind of friends do they keep? Or is he in the grooming hands of the friendly enemy living in your community?
Rachel Allison of the United Families International, speaking on poor parenting, said: “I have often told my husband, if we don’t take the time and make the effort to teach and guide and counsel our children when they are young, we will spend years trying to undo the damage that is caused by our neglect.
“Tragically, apathetic parents, the media’s decadent influence on society, and a government that is doing its best to shut God out of the conversation, have created a perfect stage for creating children who, without boundaries or principled values can destroy their lives before they reach adulthood.”
First Published 2017
