Juliana Francis
Do you guys still remember the story of the 18-year-old boy that strangled his mother in Edo State, while she was asleep?
At an age when most of his mates were burning midnight candles, studying for one examination or the other, he has become a killer.
It’s a tragic situation and should bother any right thinking parent. Don’t say God forbid and leave it at that! No parent ever expects his child to turn on him or her. But sadly, that’s what we are witnessing these days.
For the benefit of those, who couldn’t recollect the incident; let me quickly rehash the story.
An 18-year-old boy strangled his mom, while she was asleep and had sex with her corpse for two days, believing it will catapult him into stupendous wealth. The incident happened on October 10, 2019.
It was a celebrated case in most of the national dailies in Nigeria. While one version of the story states that a spiritualist asked him to carry out the dastardly act, another version says that he was instructed by a guy living in the same community with him.
While reading the story, three things flashed through my mind; he’s just 18, but already working in a factory. Secondly, nobody ever mentioned a father. He was under the care of his mother. Thirdly, why the heck does he want to become rich?
That was my bewilderment. At his age, the boy should be in school, maybe in secondary, not working in a factory for crying out loud. If he’s working at that age, then why is he working when he has a mom?
It’s clear nobody was ever there for him. He had to work to feed himself. And while working, must have mixed with different sets of people, who placed more value on money than other important stuffs in life.
Come on, let’s reason together. Do you seriously believe that a child, whose mom had carefully nurtured and bonded with, would gleefully kill her?
No! I don’t think so. Let’s work on the premise that there was no father figure in his life, which was probably why he gravitated towards the guy in his community. This is possibly the only man in his life that had showed an iota of interest in him.
The man’s interest in his life comes with a clause; a horrible one at that. The guy, from the beginning, must have been preparing the suspect for that great task.
The bewildered boy, who likely wouldn’t know what the heck to do with N1million if it suddenly hits him on the face, had to kill his mom. I’m guessing at a point, it must have been quite a dilemma for him to choose between the guy and his mom. He chose to please the guy, who clearly wielded a greater influence in his life.
It’s bad enough that he killed his mom, but he had to rape her, knowing full well that it was an abomination. Or does he even know? Who had ever taken time to teach him about the values of life and family ties?
This is my greatest fear; if we don’t care for our children, don’t train them; strangers would do the job for us and turn them against us. They are useful to us as our children; they are useful to strangers as criminals, paws to be use.
No matter how busy we are, we must never neglect our children because the consequences are dire.
Life is tough we know, but it shouldn’t be too tough that we can’t give our children the best.
The best begins with the definition you choose to ascribe to it. The best you give must not necessarily be the best that a senator gives to his/her children. It is what you want it to be; what life and society have given you, and what you can squeeze out of both for your child.
The best also begins with giving them your time, no matter how busy you are.
You don’t have to send your kids to the best school, but you can send them to an affordable or even a government school. The issue here is to try all possible best to give them the minimum of education.
Children, who are often neglected, turn to gangsters, seeking to be loved and accepted. They grow up to become a social nuisance to their families, communities and the country as a whole. They become criminals, with their parents, who had earlier neglected them, becoming petrified of them.
Every child naturally gravitates towards love and care. It’s a natural thing. A child, no matter his/her age, knows when they are loved. Give them that attention. As parents, it’s not a choice, it’s a responsibility and it must be carried out to the letter. Don’t foist your child on the streets of life, expecting them to turn out well. If they do turn out, it’s surely divine intervention.
A criminal youth or adult is naturally a problem to everyone around him/her. Nobody can escape. It all starts from the foundation; tackle that foundation before the child becomes too tough for you to handle.
In Africa, we believe that an Okra tree cannot grow taller than its planter, but today, Okra trees are not just growing taller than their planters, they are even now snubbing lives out of its planters.
Some years back, a man in his twenties killed his mom in FCT, Abuja. The woman was a politician. What happened?
She trained and fetes the boy on cocaine. She was always never around and often gave him whatever he asked for without questioning.
According to the guy, she used to fund his cocaine sniffing. Money goes swiftly through his fingers like water through a basket.
He was already an adult when Madam Commissioner decided that enough was enough. She talked about rehab, but the guy got violent. She had become basically scared of his violent tantrums.
To bend him to her will, she stopped giving him money. He started helping himself to her jewelry and when he was through with that, he started selling furniture.
The angry mother instructed security guards not to allow him into their building. She locked every wardrobe. This got him ticked off. She no longer cared where he spent the night or how he fed.
One day, he outsmarted the security guards, knowing his mom’s itineraries. He gained access into the compound, killed his mom and made away with some cash. Police had already pinned the murder on the security guards, when the guy later resurfaced and surrendered. He told everyone that his mom made him the monster he had become.
The freebies you buy, to keep them out of your hair, can never take the place of your time and attention. Neglected children often become budding criminals. Create a time today before it is too late. Don’t wait till you experienced the effect of parental neglect.
First Published 2019
